Monday, April 6, 2009

What Not to Wear...To the Gym

Okay, in my inaugural post I may have strongly hinted at this topic, but never have I devoted a full entry to the idea that certain items are just not appropriate to wear when you work out.

This has been on my mind because I see repeat offenders daily at my ACFC, and because...well, frankly, I don't see how hard it is to get this right. And while I'm all for not looking ridiculous, I also think proper gymwear is relevant where safety and comfort are concerned. Right. I think people should be safe and comfortable and also not look ridiculous.

(All right, so a lot of these items won't kill you but they'll definitely make you look like an idiot. Sue me.)

Here we go...

  1. Streetwear. This category includes but is not limited to jeans, jean shorts (For shame!), cargo shorts, sandals, fashion sneakers, and three-inch heels. Seriously, I was at the gym last Thursday and there was a woman on the recumbent bike wearing a tank top, exercise shorts, and three-inch-stacked-heel slide sandals. Who goes to the trouble to dress her torso in gym clothes and then thinks, Screw sneakers---these heels make my calves look siiick? I'm not even going to talk about how dangerous this is. I'll simply point out that you should dress for your purpose, and your purpose at the gym is to move around and break a sweat. Not comfortable in jeans; certainly not practical in heels. Wear clothes that are built for movement and breathing, and shoes that give you support and stability.
  2. Anything too tiny. Look, you're sure to be bouncing around, bending and moving various parts, and I don't want to see said parts. Shorts that are too short (listen up, gentlemen) and tops that are too low-cut are a recipe for temporary blindness on my part. You may think you look hot, but I guarantee people are talking about you, and not in a good way.
  3. Those garbage-bag sweat-suit thingies. Unless you're a competitive wrestler trying to drop weight quickly (even so, not something I'd advise), it doesn't make any sense for you wear one of these. You'll probably sweat more, which means you'll lose some water weight, which means you'll need to drink more water to make up for it, which means you'll end up right where you started. Besides, the last thing anyone needs at their health club is sweaty people sweating more.
  4. Weightbelts. You're a tool.
  5. Light-gray cotton leggings. Ew. These should be boycotted where sweating of any kind is involved. Also, no one looks good from behind in them, especially not when you have---
  6. Visible panty lines. Leggings and yoga pants are a popular choice for women gymgoers these days, and why shouldn't they be---you don't have to shave your legs! But unless you're prepared to only wear tops that fall past your butt, invest in some thongs or other seamless underwear. Also, be sure your leggings are actually intended for exercise and not meant to be worn as tights: some versions are quite sheer.

Anything I've left out?

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